Forgiveness

Getting your ex back and moving forward is a difficult thing to figure out when someone has been hurt. Most likely it was both of you who were hurt and both of you who did the hurting. Forgiveness is essential to any relationship being mended and has to happen if you want to know how to win your ex back.

Learning how to get your ex back is going to involve learning humility on both sides. Being selfish is what got your relationship in trouble at the beginning. You decided that the individual that you cheated on your spouse with was more important than what you two had as a couple.

People make mistakes. It is true that some mistakes are too big to overcome but most mistakes that people make in relationships are trivial. They are also made in the heat of the moment and often times can be exaggerated. Realize that it is easy for someone to say or do the wrong thing when they aren’t thinking clearly. That excuse cannot be used all the time, though.

If you have had the wrong thing said or done to you, think of the context. What was going on around that time that made things as bad as what it got? Was there something going on in one of your lives outside of the relationship that brought unnecessary strain? If you can recognize what it was, you have a chance to learn how to get your ex back.

If you had your pride and feelings hurt by the actions of another, can you forgive them? Can you suck back in your pride and realize that it was a mistake and what you had was greater than the incidents that drove you apart? Can you be willing to forgive it and let it go? You will have to learn how to do this if you want to know how to get your ex back.

If you hurt someone dear to you, you need to suck back in your pride as well. Realize that you made a mistake. Own up to it and take responsibility for your actions. If it is important to you to know how to get back your ex then you have to realize that there are things that you are going to have to correct in the way that you handle situations. If there is some problem or mistake that you keep making, get counseling or some kind of help. Don’t expect that you can continue to do the same thing over and over and expect different results.

Be able to approach each other with humility, not holding yourself up over the other person. Stop thinking that you are too big to come back and say, “I’m sorry.” When someone says to you that they are sorry don’t hold it over them and say, “Yeah, you should be.” Decide that what you have as a couple is more important than the problems that came and decide to work together as a team to overcome them. If you do this, then you are well on your way to getting your ex back. :)

New Squidoo Lens

Hey everyone...just thought I would let you know that I posted a new lens on Squidoo titled, Magic Of Making Up - 10 Ways To Save A Relationship.

If you have yet to hear about "T Dub" Jackson's, Magic of Making Up ebook, it is a book which has helped thousands of people get their lost loves back. He is a modern-day "Dear Abby". He gives relationship advice that works. If you want to check out his website, here it is.

Here's some relationship quotes for your enjoyment. Thought I would give you something fun to read. :)

"Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down." -Oprah Winfrey

"Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they're trying to find someone who's going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take." -Anthony Robbins

"Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never, ever the same." -Flavia Weedn

"The act of forgiveness is the act of returning to present time. And that's why when one has become a forgiving person, and has managed to let go of the past, what they've really done is they've shifted their relationship with time." –Caroline Myss

"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." –Mark Twain

"Well, it seems to me that the best relationships - the ones that last - are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is...suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with" -Gillian Anderson

"Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies." –Aristotle

"The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart." –Helen Keller

"Where does the family start? It starts with a young man falling in love with a girl - no superior alternative has yet been found." –Winston Churchill

"It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations." –Kahlin Gibran

"To love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person." –Eric Fromm

"Man is a knot into which relationships are tied." -Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"You can't stop loving or wanting to love because when its right, it's the best thing in the world. When you're in a relationship and it's good, even if nothing else in your life is right, you feel like your whole world is complete." -Keith Sweat

"Our greatest joy-and our greatest pain comes in our relationships with others."
-Stephen R. Covey

"Love doesn't just sit there like a stone; it has to be made - like bread, remade all the time, made new." –Ursula LeGuin

"Once the trust goes out of a relationship, it's really no fun lying to 'em anymore." -Norm from Cheers

Thanks for reading my post,
Nicole
"Live, Laugh, Love"

Getting Your Ex Back After An Affair - Restoring Trust in Relationships

Hey everyone...just thought I would post some more great information from the one and only Travis, aka, "T Dub", author of "The Magic Of Making Up". Check out my website or his for more excerpts or testimonials if you wanted to read anymore on it. It's some good stuff. He's helped alot of people get back their loves. :)

How do you get your ex back even after you’ve cheated? Some people claim that an affair should always end a relationship. But I disagree. I believe that every relationship is savable if both parties really want to work on it. This article is about restoring trust in relationships.

Restoring trust in relationships requires an adjustment in attitude and actions. Even after an affair, it is possible to save a relationship. But that starts with ramping up the level of trust within the couple.

If you have had an affair, you have had an attitude which allowed you to stray. There may be something at the relationship’s core that is diseased. But you can heal the disease.

What was it that you were looking for when you strayed? Was the sex amazing? Was she too busy for you? Was she just not spending enough time on her grooming?

You wouldn’t have had an affair if the primary relationship was perfect. So, what needs to be done to fix it? Often that lies in self analysis. But just as often, that lies in the couple’s relationship.

Restoring trust in relationships means fixing the underlying problems. Sometimes that means going into couples counseling.

But just understanding our thoughts isn’t enough. The next step is to take concrete action in fixing the problems.

The secret to restoring trust in relationships lies not in talking about the right things, but in doing the right things.

One of the biggest things you can do is to make small promises and keep them. If you promise to take the trash out every evening, do it. And, do it consistently. When you demonstrate that you can be trusted in the small things, a gradual sense of confidence will be realized in the larger picture of the relationship.

Your girlfriend or wife is going to need constant reassurance that you have changed. This means that you are going to need to apologize more than once over time. You will also need to treat the recurring comments about the violation of trust as a matter of course. It is not easy for her to forgive the breach. If you want to stay with her, you will be patient with her.

This does not mean that you must feel guilty about the indiscretion forever. In fact, if you allow her to constantly guilt trip you, she will not be satisfied in the new relationship you are building. Just be understanding.

Finally, you need to put a positive spin on the incident. Treat it as an opportunity for both of you to grow as individuals and for the relationship to mature. Just as a bone grows stronger at the place it has been broken, a relationship can improve after an affair.

Restoring trust in a relationship takes time. It requires that you change both your attitudes and actions. But it is possible to heal the divide and be a stronger couple as a result.

Check out Magic Of Making Up for yourself!!!

Nicole
"Live, Laugh, Love"

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Just thought I would wish everyone a Happy And Prosperous New Year!!!!
I hope 2009 brings nothing but the best for everyone. :)

Take care,
Nicole

Check out my website!

I finally got my website up and running so check it out...
Nicole's website

I'm going to be adding to it so bookmark it and check back with me. :)

Thanks,
Nicole

Magic Of Making Up

THE MAGIC MAKING UP was written by T.W. Jackson and is an awesome ebook that has helped over 6100 people get back their loved ones. And that number keeps growing and growing with this powerful ebook.

How many of you lost your boyfriend or girlfriend and would do anything to get him or her back? I know I have been there. Hell, some of the things I have done to get an ex back could be considered down-right "psycho" to most people! hahaha But when you love someone you will go to the ends of the earth to get them back.

Wouldn't it be great if you had the proper guidance in how to go about handling getting your ex back, instead of the stalker ways?
How many times have you text or e-mailed begging and pleading like a puppy? Or calling and leaving voicemails until their mailbox was full? WE'VE ALL DONE IT!!!

There are better ways of dealing with things and going about different situations that will get better responses than the ones that you may think of at the time because your head is not all there. (Hence, where the "psycho" part comes in!) Things that years down the road when you think about what you did, you can laugh and say, "what the hell was I thinking?!?!?"

Here's a little bit of what you can find in his book:
How to Get Back With My Ex Girlfriend

If you are wondering how you can get back with your ex girlfriend, the first thing that you need to understand is that this is a very delicate situation. Your feelings may be hurt, and her feelings may also be hurt - And it is important that you are careful about what you're doing accordingly, otherwise feelings may be hurt even worse.

Here are the considerations that you need to make when it comes to figuring out how to get back with your ex girlfriend.

1 - First and foremost, what was it that you did in order to cause the break up? Girls do not break up with guys completely out of the blue, so there is probably a really good reason behind the action even if you are not immediately aware of what it is. The first step in this process has to be to figure out what went wrong, whether or not it could have been prevented, and how can you fix it now that you know what it is.

2 - If the break up with your ex girlfriend was entirely your fault, then the first thing that you need to do to help rekindle things is to let your ex girlfriend know that you recognize what happened, you recognize that it was your fault, and that you are sorry for your actions and the unintended consequences.

3 - You should continue to socialize with other people, even though you are trying to date your ex again. Just because you and your ex are not in contact right now, that does not mean that you need to cut yourself off from the rest of the world. You should date another girl, or at least go out and have some fun with your friends. It may even work to your advantage for you to cause some jealousy in your ex partner if you really do want to get them back.

4 - Show your ex that you have moved on, but you also need to show her that you still care about her. This is the most ideal way to eventually get her back. Let her know that you have not completely moved on, and that you still have feelings for her, and this will make you appear more mature to her, and more desirable as well.

5 - Finally, it is important that you work hard to become friends with your ex again. This will build trust, and will help to make you closer to one another.

Afterwards, you should ask her why you broke up in the first place, but be casual about it rather than appearing desperate. She will either admit that it was a mistake that the two of you broke up, or she will let you know that the break up was for the better. Once you have an answer, you can proceed from there.


See how none of that was psycho-stalker-ish???
He really does make alot of sense and has helped thousands of people get their ex's back.


Check out my Squidoo Lens to read more about it.

Or you can go directly to "T" Dub's site.

I will be back to give updates and more tips from him. Thanks for checking out my blog and leave me feedback. :)